Jibbs Medley
by NCISgeek
Summary: A medley of music! Various one-shots of moments between Jenny and Gibbs based on different song lyrics.
1. Outlaws of Love

Disclaimer: The song belongs to Adam Lambert. I do not own NCIS or its characters.

_**oh, nowhere left to go.**_

_**are we getting closer, closer?**_

_**no, all we know is no.**_

_**nights are getting colder, colder.**_

Jenny stood, on his porch, leaning forward on the tips of her toes. She stood in front of his door, hesitating to knock, her gloved hand fisted in a small ball, an inch away from the wood. It was dark; the lamppost offered little weak, flickering yellow light. The temperature was dropping, quickly. Her cheeks and nose were turning a cherry red, while the tips of her ears turned red too. She shivered, pulling her long coat tighter around herself. She wanted warmth, the warmth he could offer her. But she couldn't do it. She turned around, stepping down on the step, when she heard the door open up behind her.

_**hey.**_

_**tears all fall the same.**_

_**we all feel the pain**_

_**we can't change.**_

"Jen?" His voice stopped her in her tracks. His voice brought back all of the memories, the painful, the bittersweet...

"Jen," he repeated. "What're you doin' here?"

Trying her best to conceal the surge of raw emotion that rose up inside her and clawed her on the inside, she slowly turned.

"Jethro, " She tried for a half smile. "It's pretty cold out here. Are you going to let me freeze?" The jibe incited a faint smirk. He opened the door wider, letting some of the warm air rush out. Gratefully, she stepped inside the softly lit hallway.

"Why've you come here, Jen?" He asked as he shut the door behind her.

"Got nowhere else to go," She stated simply, shedding her coat and placing it on the coat rack.

_**everywhere we go**_

_**i'm lookin' for the sun.**_

_**nowhere to grow old.**_

_**and always on the run.**_

_**they say we'll rot in hell**_

_**but i don't think we will**_

_**they've branded us enough**_

_**outlaws of love.**_

"I was trying to find some warmth," She elaborated.

"Couldn't find any at home, Director?" He asked mockingly. She shrugged, ignoring the jab.

"No one can give me the warmth that you can," she said quietly, releasing her red hair, which fell down from its tight ponytail.

_**scars make us who we are**_

_**hearts and homes are broken, broken.**_

_**far, we could go so far**_

_**with our minds wide open, open.**_

She was scarred. She couldn't love anyone, because she knew if she did, they wouldn't ever be able to stay the same. Jethro knew that, and he accepted it. He was hoping though, maybe she could find closure with herself, and maybe, maybe she would let him in. Let him in, let him love her like she loved him.

_**hey**_

_**tears all fall the same**_

_**we all feel the rain**_

_**we can't change.**_

She went to him, to escape the pain and to escape the life she had handed herself over to. Turning her back on him, she took a few ragged breaths. Suddenly, she felt his strong, warm arms wrap around her. "It ain't a crime to cry, Jen." He whispered, his soft breath tickling her cold ear. She didn't know, but something clicked within her. Something that let her accept him into her life. Something that let him be part of her, her heart.

_**everywhere we go**_

_**i'm lookin' for the sun.**_

_**nowhere to grow old.**_

_**and always on the run.**_

_**they say we'll rot in hell**_

_**but i don't think we will**_

_**they've branded us enough**_

_**outlaws of love.**_

She turned around to face him in his warm embrace. Her tired emerald green eyes met his soft ice blue ones. She leaned forward, not thinking about the consequences if they were found out, and she kissed him. Slowly. Passionately.

_**outlaws of love.**_

_**outlaws of love.**_


	2. What Hurts The Most

Hi, this is NCISgeek! the story Jibbs Medley is my first. I do not own this song (belongs to Rascal Flatts) or the NCIS characters portrayed.

Parts of the story will be in different views. Some of the times it will be in Gibbs, sometimes it will be in Jenny's.

* * *

_**I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house**_

_**That don't bother me**_

He sat alone in his basement. The rain rattled noisily off the creaky windowpanes. He held a mason jar full of bourbon, untouched, in his right hand. In his left, he held a picture of Jenny, the one he had taken in Serbia. His house was empty; just the unfinished boat, the untouched alcohol, and him, heavy with the weight of the burning memories, each one struggling for his attention.

_**I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out**_

_**I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while even though**_

_**Goin' on with you gone still upsets me**_

Jenny exhaled wearily, tears threatening on the verge of her sight. Gosh, how she missed him so much, even though she was the one who severed ties with him. She had to face it. He was gone, and he probably wasn't coming back. She knew though, if she called him, maybe, just maybe… _No,_ she reprimanded herself. _No. _She sighed, and closed her eyes. She dredged up those old memories of him, him and her. A pang stabbed deeply into her heart, though she would never admit it. He had probably forgotten her by now. Now she had to let him go too.

_**There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay**_

_**But that's not what gets me**_

"Hey Boss," Tony greeted Gibbs in the morning. Gibbs just grunted a monosyllable reply. Nothing was out of the ordinary. Everything was the same. Except, something bugged Gibbs. He tried to shake off the feeling, but it wouldn't let go of him.

_**What hurts the most**_

_**Was being so close**_

_**And havin' so much to say**_

_**And watchin' you walk away**_

He remembered the letter. So cold, so impersonal. He read it. He almost threw it away. Almost, but not quite. She had walked away from him. He had planned on telling her on the plane… had been hiding the little velvet box that he had tucked away… Now it was too late, too late to do anything but let the feelings wash over him.

_**And never knowin'**_

_**What could've been**_

_**And not seein' that lovin' you**_

_**Is what I was tryin' to do**_

She never knew what would've happened if she had stayed. She just hoped that Gibbs knew that she had to do it. She had to get revenge for her father. But she loved him, loved Gibbs. He was the only man she had ever truly loved. And she felt the pain as clearly as he did.

_**It's hard to deal with the pain of losin' you everywhere I go**_

_**But I'm doin' it**_

_**It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone**_

Are you okay, Jethro?" Ducky's voice sliced through Gibbs's brief reverie. "You have been acting rather strange lately." Gibbs forced a smirk.

"Nah, Duck, I'm acting the way I've always been. Don't worry," he said, patting his old friend on the back.

The problem was, whenever Gibbs saw Ducky, it brought up memories of her. Always, memories of her also brought pain. And he briskly walked out of the autopsy lab, to escape the rush of memories pouring in from all sides.

_**Still harder gettin' up, gettin' dressed, livin' with this regret**_

_**But I know if I could do it over**_

_**I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart**_

_**That I left unspoken**_

She groaned. It was time to get back up for another day of grueling, unrewarding work. It would be more bearable, if he had still been there. Oh, what she would've given to have him back. And she promised herself, if she ever saw him again, she would tell him the three little words that meant everything. She would whisper it quietly. She would tell him that she loved him.

_**What hurts the most**_

_**Is being so close**_

_**And havin' so much to say**_

_**(Much to say)**_

_**And watchin' you walk away**_

Here she was, standing right in front of him. So close, yet so far away. He wanted to tell her, get angry at her, but he couldn't. So she walked away, again.

_**And never knowin'**_

_**What could've been**_

_**And not seein' that lovin' you**_

_**Is what I was tryin' to do, oh**_

_**Oh yeah**_

Here she was, sitting in his basement. If she had stayed with him in Paris, they might've gotten to this part ten years ago. But she didn't, and she didn't stay this time either. As the basement door closed, Gibbs slumped down to the floor. All he wanted to do was love her, but she wouldn't let him in. _"There won't be an off-the-job, special agent Gibbs."_

_**What hurts the most**_

_**Was being so close**_

_**And havin' so much to say**_

_**(To say)**_

_**And watchin' you walk away**_

Here he was, standing right in front of her at the top of the metal stairs, just an inch away from her. "It's good to see you again, Jen." And what hurt the most was the genuine smile that played around his mouth. She opened her mouth to tell him the same, but she couldn't. So he walked away.

_**And never knowin'**_

_**What could've been**_

_**And not seein' that lovin' you**_

_**Is what I was tryin' to do**_

They both were looking out their windows. One was looking at a shooting star, reminiscing about when she did the same too. He remembered her wish. She wished that they could stay forever in Paris. And although he didn't consciously make a wish, he wished for the same thing too.

The other turned their back on the window, and took a sip of bourbon to numb the growing ache. She wished that she could have made it work, when she had to leave him. But it wasn't possible. Or had it been?

_**Not seein' that lovin' you**_

_**That's what I was trying to do**_

* * *

_Review please? And if you have any song suggestions or any ideas to improve the stories, or anything you find wrong, PM me!_


	3. As You Turn Away

As You Turn Away by Lady Antebellum. I don't own NCIS. If I did, Jenny would still be alive :/ Thanks to fashiongirl97 for beta-ing this story! :)

* * *

_**Standing face to face**_

_**Wrapped in your embrace**_

_**I don't wanna let you go**_

_**But you're already gone**_

He's holding her, but he can still feel it: the half-second moment of hesitation whenever he offers her his embrace; the slight tug when she pulls away. But not tonight. Tonight, she holds him like she's afraid he'll leave. _Not possible_, he argued with himself_. Jenny is never afraid of anything._ Tomorrow, they'll leave to head back to the Washington Navy Yard, normality. He doesn't understand why she is acting this way. But he will do - soon.

_**Now you kiss my cheek**_

_**Soft and bittersweet**_

_**I can read it in your eyes**_

_**Baby, this is our goodbye**_

He can't help but get a sense of foreboding. She won't meet his eyes. He noticed that she has been busy writing… but writing what? She stands up, looks into his eyes for the briefest of moments, and then looks away. She walks over to him, and leans down to give him a gentle kiss. "Bye, Jethro. I have to go somewhere. Will you please take my coat to the airport?" It was a sudden request, but uncertainly he said yes; he could never deny her such a simple request. He heads down to the airport, to wait for the plane ride home. And to wait for Jenny, but she has already gone – he just doesn't know it yet.

_**Nothing more to say**_

_**Nothing left to break**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Hoping you might stay**_

It's been fifteen years, a life time in many ways. She's no longer the snarky field agent who knew how to press his buttons. She's the Director now; she's strong, powerful and serious. But at least she's back.

_**Nothing more to give**_

_**Nothing left to take**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Reaching out for you**_

_**As you turn away**_

"Jen," he calls out to her, but she ignores him. She can't, won't face the memories that he brings up inside her. The memories are too painful to remember and recall. He's reaching out for her… but she's turning away.

_**Let go of my hand**_

_**So I can feel again**_

_**Nothing's gonna hurt as much**_

_**As that final touch**_

He's used to it by now; the pretense that they have forgotten Paris, Marseilles, Positano, Serbia… That they have forgotten it all: the feelings, memories, laughs and love. But he knows that she remembers. He can tell by the regret that lingers within her gaze as she watches his team complete another case. The way she'll watch over them, aid them more and give them, give him lee way.

_**No we can't be friends**_

'_**Cause I don't think I could take seeing you**_

_**And knowing where we've been**_

_**I hope you understand**_

_We're just friends_, he said to himself, a bit bitterly. But it wasn't true, they both knew that. There was more to it. The tension that arose whenever they were in the same room, the way that they could easily talk to each other and the way they knew each other was far from 'just friends'. But both of them refused to take the step that would lead them into the unknown. Maybe it was because they could not face the heart ache if it all went wrong, or if it ended like last time. They had felt that pain once, twice might be too much.

_**Nothing more to say**_

_**Nothing left to break**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Hoping you might stay**_

He holds out the tumbler of bourbon out to her. She takes it, and sips a bit of the acidic drink.

"I've got to go," she mumbles, setting the glass down.

"Jen," he says, but it is too late. She's already gone.

_**Nothing more to give**_

_**Nothing left to take**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Reaching out for you**_

_**As you turn away**_

She's not home when her housekeeper opens the door. He can hear nothing coming from her house. Nothing. So he leaves. He has to find her, and tell her what's on his mind. He has to tell her what he never told her before.

_**One step my heart is breaking**_

_**One more my hands are shaking**_

_**The door is closing**_

_**And I just can't change it**_

She tried to control her shaking hands, but she can't open the door. "Please, please, please," she repeated, her resolve wavering. The door opens, and he sees her, cold, drenched… shaking. He takes her in, and closes the door. No questions asked. It's always been and will always be that way, because with these two words aren't needed.

_**Nothing more to say**_

_**Nothing left to break**_

There was nothing more to say between them, words had lost all meaning. Talking with their eyes, without words was more honest, because then the façade was gone and the truth was said.

_**Nothing more to give**_

_**Nothing left to take**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Reaching out for you**_

_**I keep reaching out for you**_

_**Reaching out for you**_

_**As you turn away,**_

_**As you turn away,**_

_**As you turn away...**_


	4. When You Were Mine

_Song goes to Lady Antebellum, characters belong to NCIS._

_**Words spoken, my heart open, **_

_**No I never had butterflies like that, **_

_**We danced in the moon glow, **_

_**Your hands moved slow, **_

_**You kissed me on the lips, **_

_**Swore I wouldn't look back.**_

The music floated lazily in the air. Jenny stood up, swaying her hips as she made her way over to the balcony. The view was splendid; moonlight danced off the Seine River and the crowded streets bustled with nightlife. Far above the sprawling city, the two lovers watched silently, an air of love surrounding them with its warmth. Music spiraled upwards from the band that was playing down below, and Gibbs asked, smiling, "Wanna dance?" She obliged, a grin appearing at his self-satisfied, trademark smirk, that never faltered to make her go weak at the knees. They did the first few steps of the waltz, Gibbs's arms lightly encircling her waist and holding her hand, when he leaned forward and started to lightly place kisses along her jaw line. Jenny's heart leaped, and she playfully swatted away his head.

"Save that for later," She whispered teasingly. He simply laughed, a twinkle in his eye, and Jenny promised herself, even if it was for just those few seconds, that she would forget the past and just enjoy the moment with him, with the man she loved.

_**It was just like we were flying, in another time, **_

_**I felt the world was ours for the taking, **_

_**When I fell into your eyes, **_

_**Never a doubt that we would make it if we tried, **_

_**You promised you'd never break my heart, **_

_**Never leave me in the dark, **_

_**Said your love would be for all time, **_

_**But that was back when you were mine. **_

_**When you were...**_

She remembered the very first time she saw him, as vividly as if it were yesterday. The first time that she looked into those icy blue eyes, she had no idea what she was getting herself into back then. She didn't know that she was going to experience the rare scorching love that only happens once in a century- but the hotter the love, the colder and more bitter the ending.

**_Here, with me, I thought we'd be, _**

**_Stronger than the past, _**

**_Better than the ones before, _**

**_How did I fool myself in thinking, _**

**_We had it all..._**

He thought they had it all. That everything was perfect. He thought she was finally the one who would be able to heal his deep wounds, and help him realize he could love again. Yet all she did was make them deeper.

Now that he looks back on it, he should've realized she was going to leave in the end. Not because she wasn't loyal, sometimes she was loyal to a fault. Her loyalty to her father is what destroyed them; the secrets she had to keep were because of _him. _Bitter thoughts ran through his mind, each one tainting the memories that remained of the happier times, of her. Bitter thoughts; they were his only defense against the torrent of her overpowering memories that haunted and lingered in his mind.

_**I felt the world was ours for the taking, **_

_**When I fell into your eyes, **_

_**Never a doubt that we would make it if we tried, **_

_**You promised you'd never break my heart, **_

_**Never leave me in the dark, **_

_**Said your love would be for all time, **_

_**But that was back when you were mine. **_

_**When you were...**_

_**What if this was it baby?**_

_**What if this was our time?**_

_**Maybe we're all past saving,**_

_**I'm gonna give you one try, **_

_**You better think twice, **_

_**Before you leave her behind.**_

He had to choose. Shannon and Kelly… or Jenny. Their ghosts… or her love. She wasn't making him choose, she wouldn't ask that, but he still had to – for his own sake. Choose… between his first family and their eternal love, who will never come back, or the woman who left him with a broken heart, but did come back, and still had his heart. He had to leave one of them behind, make one of them his past. He just didn't know which one.

_**And what if the world was ours for the taking?**_

_**When I fell into your eyes, **_

_**Never a doubt that we would make it if we tried, **_

_**You promised you'd never break my heart, **_

_**Never leave me in the dark, **_

_**Said your love would be for all time, **_

_**But that was back when you were mine. **_

_**When we were in love, **_

_**Do you remember the time, **_

_**When you were mine?**_

He remembered; he remembered the period of time when he could hold her in his arms, lean down and kiss her unabashedly. Now, they were both wary of each other, holding each other at arm's length. Now, they were simply professional. He held back because he didn't want to feel that pain again; she held back because she knew that she didn't want to hurt him again, and she couldn't trust herself not to. But they both remembered the time when they belonged to each other, and only each other. The time when they wore smiles day in and day out, and would lay their lives down for the other without a second thought. Wait. He backtracked in his way of thinking. He would still lay down his life for her; he knew she would just do the same for him. Despite what had happened between them, the same fierce bond of protectiveness held them together; and yet ironically, it held them apart.

_**(That was back when you were mine)**_

_**What if this was it baby?**_

_**What if this was our time?**_

_**(Back when we were in love)**_

_**Back when you were mine**_

_**(That was back when you were mine)**_

_**Back when we were in love,**_

_**In love...**_

Paris. Serbia. Positano. Marseilles. On every single op, every single country, every single city, they had been in love. The wild, reckless love that leaves you breathless, and wanting more. The love that burns like a flare; bright and hot for the longest of seconds, then dies and goes dark. But there was still hope, deep down hidden behind the professionalism. Despite what each other thought, underneath all the pretenses, they still loved each other. They didn't say it in words, but they said it with their actions, because words could not define the feelings between them. They never had or would be able to.

_**You said you'd be there,**_

_**You'd said it'd last forever,**_

_**I guess you never really meant it baby**_

_**Did you baby?**_


	5. Ready To Love Again

Ready To Love Again by Lady Antebellum_._

* * *

_**Seems like I was walking in the wrong direction**_

_**I barely recognize my own reflection, no**_

_**Scared of love but scared of life alone**_

She knew that by walking away from him, she was walking the wrong way. She was walking away from his love, his warm embrace, and his strong and safe arms. Crossing over a wooden bridge, she tried to escape the flood of unexpected, overwhelming feelings. She looked down towards the clear, calm pond. She suddenly stopped, and gazed into the mirrored surface. The person looking back at her… was not her, not the person she thought she was, hoped she was. It was her, but it was a stranger. The always-present fire-red hair, the sharp bright green eyes, red lips… It was her eyes, but instead of the fire that usually burned bright within them, there was simply a dullness that showed the emotional and physical fatigue she was feeling. She suddenly felt sick at who she had become. Why? Why? Why? Why? She turned around, desperate not to see that person again. She couldn't make herself go through this anymore. Steeling herself, she walked back, each step sounding like another part of her heart breaking, and another silent plea. A sound that no one else could hear - but one which rung inside of her mind, every minute of every hour of every day.

_**Seems I've been playing on the safe side baby**_

_**Building walls around my heart to save me, oh**_

_**But it's time for me to let it go**_

She had never let anyone close to her heart after Jethro. She had never loved anyone else like she had Jethro. Ever since Paris, she had built walls around herself; impenetrable, impassable. Sure, she went on dates and flirted, but she always left before it got too serious. Better leave them with brutal honesty than with lying. But, with him, it was different. When she saw him again, the first time in fifteen years, all those strong walls crumbled. But she hid it behind her professional facade; what else could she do? She knew what she had to do; she just didn't want to admit it. She had to let go.

_**Yeah, I'm ready to feel now**_

_**No longer am I afraid of the fall down**_

_**It must be time to move on now**_

_**Without the fear of how it might end**_

_**I guess I'm ready to love again**_

She was prepared- if you called a bottle of bourbon and lots of self-convincing 'prepared'. She didn't deny it anymore; she had _fallen_ for him, presumably fifteen years ago. As soon as she thought this, she rolled her eyes in mock disgust - so cliché. Both of them had to forget the bitterness of the past so that they could move on. Jenny wasn't afraid anymore, of how it might end. She was ready to love again. She just hoped he was too.

_**Just when we think that love will never find you**_

_**You runaway but still it's right behind you, oh**_

_**It's just something that you can't control**_

She ran away once, for her career; it had made her leave him. But this time, she wouldn't let it. She was not going to run away this time, she swore to herself, as she knew that neither of them could take the pain that would come with leaving again. The last time she did, she had never been able to let go. A sudden memory or flashback would always slap her in the face, made her realize just what she had lost. Especially when she saw younger couples, so in love, so carefree and happy, just like they used to be. It always made her realize just how alone she really was. But she couldn't control love, just like she couldn't control her desire to see him, to hear his voice, to be in his embrace. She wouldn't ever tell anyone, because she always felt so childish, but every time she saw a shooting star she wished on it. It was another habit she had picked up from the famous Leroy Jethro Gibbs. He used to point at one when they'd stare at the sky, and he'd say, "Make a wish." Tonight's wish: I hope…

_**Yeah, I'm ready to feel now**_

_**No longer am I afraid of the fall down**_

_**It must be time to move on now**_

_**Without the fear of how it might end**_

_**I guess I'm ready to love again**_

She stood up straight. Taking strong, determined steps, she reached the front of the door. She was fearless; tired of always beating around the bush, tonight she was going to confront him. They were going to say everything they needed to, and fight until it finally made sense. She was taking the second chance he had offered. She was taking a leap of faith.

_**So come and find me**_

_**I'll be waiting up for you**_

_**I'll be holding out for you tonight**_

She was sitting in her study; glasses perched on her nose reading some old case files when she heard him. The engine rumbled and then quickly died, cut off abruptly. Just a second later, she heard the front door open and close with the customary slam. He was here; it was now or never.

_**Yeah, I'm ready to feel now**_

_**No longer am I afraid of the fall down**_

When he approached, she stated, "I'm not afraid."

"You never were," he replied. She smiled a bit ruefully. "I was just waitin' for you to realize it."

_**It must be time to move on now**_

_**Without the fear of how it might end**_

_**I guess I'm ready, I'm ready to love again.**_

He quietly closed the door to the study for once. It was time to put the past in its place and grasp the future with open arms. That night was the night it all changed, and a life they had always dreamt of took a tentative step forward into its possible future. The last two words you could hear that night were Jenny's words, "I'm ready."


	6. Need You Now

NCIS Need You Now by Lady Antebellum

* * *

_**Picture perfect memories, scattered all around the floor**_

_**Reaching for the phone 'cause I can't fight it anymore**_

_**And I wonder if I ever cross your mind**_

_**For me it happens all the time**_

She was distracted as she walked hurriedly into the study. She tripped, yet managed to right herself before she completely fell. But she dropped the old binder on the floor that she had been carrying, and it exploded into a mass of flying papers and photos. She cursed, kneeling down to pick up the old faded papers and photos and organize them into neat, categorized files. That's when she saw it: just the corner of a photo. Jenny picked it up slowly as she stood back up. Leaning against the wall tiredly, a wave of nostalgia passed through her as she recognized it as the photo Jethro had taken of her in Serbia; she was standing in front of the old farmhouse they'd spend a week shacked up in whilst the heat cooled down from their op. As the redhead looked through the rest of the papers, she realized that she had grabbed the wrong binder; she grabbed her old middle school binder that she had so carefully kept all her precious memories of Jethro and her in. She sat down in the middle of the mess, forgetting about her previous task. Slowly, she went through every photo, each one eliciting another memory; some sweet, some funny, some sad. She finally came across the last photo she had taken of them together before she had left. They were sitting in front of the Eiffel tower, hands slung across each other's backs and big goofy grins plastered across their faces. How much she would give to go back to that moment now, to be that happy. Even to have a shred of that happiness, a remnant of those good times… That one photo was all it took; she closed her eyes, preventing the tears from escaping - but one got away anyway. She brushed it away, banishing the evidence of her emotions overflowing. Even in the privacy of her own home she kept her emotions locked away, hidden and safe. Hesitantly, she reached for her phone. Flipping it open, a fleeting thought crossed her mind. Did he ever still think of her, the way she thought of him? She paused, and bit her lip. Could she call him?

_**It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now**_

_**Said I wouldn't call but I've lost all control and I need you now**_

_**And I don't know how I can do without**_

_**I just need you now**_

She spent the rest of the night sitting, alone, in the study. It had just turned 1:15 am; she had a cup of vanilla latte, untouched, sitting on the floor next to her. Emotions tumbled within her; the turmoil was overpowering. She reached for the phone, forgetting her promise to him. She had to call him. She knew she couldn't classify this as an emergency, but she couldn't help but need him, now.

_**Another shot of whiskey, can't stop looking at the door**_

_**Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before**_

_**And I wonder if I ever cross your mind**_

_**For me it happens all the time**_

The acidic alcohol burned his throat as it made its way down his throat. Grimacing, he poured himself one more shot of whiskey. Taking another involuntary glance towards the door, he paced the length of his basement with the glass jar in his hand. He wished Jenny would come through that door, smiling her traditional professional smile, wearing one of her short skirts that god only knew how she got away with. But that hadn't happened since the first day of the job. She said she might come back, so he had stayed up for her, waiting. This was the third night. He promised himself after this, he wouldn't wait anymore, that this was the last night. The message was pretty obvious, he thought. And bitterly he wondered if he ever crossed her mind. Because for him, it happened too often.

_**It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now**_

_**Said I wouldn't call but I've lost all control and I need you now**_

_**And I don't know how I can do without**_

_**I just need you now**_

It was 1:15 am. After a few more shots of whiskey, he set the glass down, his head spinning. He sank down to the ground, against the side of the wall. The pain in his heart too much, he grabbed his phone. He couldn't fear the rejection anymore, because he needed her. He needed Jenny now.

_**Woah, woah**_

_**Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all**_

She was surprised to see his number flashing up on her cell, just when she was about to hit his speed dial. Unsure what to do, she opened the phone and held it up to her ear. "Jethro?" She asked, uncertain why he had called.

"Jen," a hoarse, uneven voice replied. She was shocked at how much it hurt to hear his rough, gruff voice_. Guess it's better to hurt than feel nothing at all_, she thought. And yet she couldn't help but somewhat smile when she asked, "Are you drunk?" Her smile turned into one of a concerned frown when she heard him say, "I need you now, Jen." Without a single word, she got up from the floor of her study, and went downstairs. Moving quickly out the door, the only thing she said before hanging up was "I'm coming." She was sort of relieved, now she knew that they both felt the same way, and both needed each other.

_**It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now**_

_**And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now**_

_**And I don't know how I can do without**_

_**I just need you now, I just need you now**_

She arrived there in less than five minutes – a personal and illegal best. Bursting through the door, she almost ran into him. She stopped suddenly, and she could hear it: the silence hung like a dead weight in the air, pressing down on everything around them. They stood there, avoiding each other's gaze. Jethro wouldn't meet her eyes, and Jenny couldn't meet his. Not saying anything, he took her hand, and pulled her into a tight embrace. She just hugged him back; she needed this as much as he did. They both needed each other; always had, always will.

_**Oh baby, I need you now**_


	7. The Mess I Made

The Mess I Made by Parachute.

_**Should've kissed you there**_

_**I should've held your face**_

_**I should've watched those eyes**_

_**Instead of run in place**_

_**I should've called you out**_

_**I should've said your name**_

_**I should've turned around**_

_**I should've looked again**_

She should've done so many things, before she had walked away, before it had been too late, before she had gotten on that airplane that had taken her away from Jethro. She should've held his face in her hands, looked deep in his eyes, kissed his lips… She should've called to him, said his name one last time, she should've turned around to take one last look at the face that she wouldn't see for the next fifteen years. All these things that she should've, could've, would've done… but never did.

_**But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**As you turn, you take your heart and walk away**_

There he stood. Nothing had changed. Those same icy blue eyes that made her knee go weak, that unruly mess of silver hair that just so suited him, if only slightly more silvery. The way his voice was still rough and forceful. The only thing that had changed was the way his heart was guarded – off limits – it kept them an arm's length away from each other. She stared as he turned his back on her, stared at the mess she had made by falling in love with a man who was maybe too complex even for her to handle. On those stairs, he had offered his heart to her again. But she didn't- couldn't- take it. So he turned and walked away. The same way she had, fifteen years ago, in Paris. A mockery of the mistake, the mess she had made.

_**Should've held my ground**_

_**I could've been redeemed**_

_**For every second chance**_

_**That changed its mind on me,**_

_**I should've spoken up**_

_**I should've proudly claimed**_

_**That oh my head's to blame**_

_**For all my heart's mistakes**_

Love could've redeemed her, could've saved her. It could have been a second chance for her, for them, if she had said yes. She should've said something more, should've spoken up. She should've confessed to him, told him that she didn't follow her heart the first time around– for both of their sakes. Sitting, alone, in her big comfy Director chair, she felt hollow, empty, and alone. She had traded the love of her life for ambition, for a career, and it was only now that she realized that that was the biggest mistake she had ever made.

_**But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**As you turn, you take your heart and walk away**_

Mistakes create messes – a fact of life. Here Jenny was, looking at hers, untouchable and irreversible. He was gone. He'd moved on and had someone else now, she thought ruefully. How silly it had been to think he had never really gotten over her. With a pang of jealousy, Jenny enviously imagined the lucky woman, wrapped in his warm strong hug, feeling his kiss, staring into his clear blue eyes. What hurt the worst though was the thought that he had forgotten her, forgotten how they had felt about one another, forgotten everything that had happened between them; like he made it seem that they were nothing, insignificant. Resignedly, she shook her head, dispelling any thoughts about him. What a mess she was, loving someone else whose heart she had broken, and now loved someone else. If only she could right her wrong, maybe she could love him again. Maybe, he could love her again.

_**And it's you...**_

_**And it's you...**_

_**And it's you...**_

_**And it's you...**_

_**And it's falling down**_

_**As you walk away**_

_**And it's on me now**_

_**As you go...**_

It was getting so hard now, watching him walk away from her everyday. The world seemed to be made of glass; fragile, as if it could be shattered with simply a single breath. It was up to her now, to decide. To stand up to him, or let him walk away with her heart still clutched in his hands.

_**But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**As you turn, you take your heart and walk away**_

Loving him from far away: it was painful, but the safest way to love – for both of them. She couldn't believe how a mistake she made so long ago could impact her life now, could still haunt her decades later. But now she was going to right her wrong; here she was, standing in front of him. She didn't say anything; she didn't know what to say to him. The rocks that separated them were too jagged to try to jump over; the only way was to be completely honest to him, lay her thoughts bare and wear her heart on her sleeve for him. But she was too late. He had to go; another murder case. He turned away; walked away. Without even a simple goodbye or glance backwards.

_**And it's falling down**_

_**As you walk away**_

_**And it's on me now**_

_**As you go...**_

"Jethro…" He looked up, meeting her gaze from up above on the catwalk. It was up to her now. This time, she was going to talk to him and she wasn't going to take no for an answer, she wouldn't back down until she had cleared up her mess. Seeing the determined gleam in her eye, he climbed the metal stairs.

"Yeah, Jen?" He offered her a sip of his black coffee. Even though she hated the taste, she took a sip. Then handing it back, she breathed in deeply, the smell of him overwhelming her senses with him so close – a heady mix of sawdust and coffee, with clingy traces of bourbon and whiskey.

"We need to talk." Jenny held his eyes, meeting them with the same levelness and confidence that got her to her position, although she didn't feel that way right now. At the present moment, she felt like a small child, wanting to hide herself in a corner far away from this problem, this mess she created.

"Somethin' on your mind, Director?" he answered, raising an eyebrow.

"Just need your help cleaning up a mess that I made, fifteen years ago in Paris." She replied, her voice even. He didn't say anything; just gave her a confused look over the rim of the coffee cup he was currently drinking.

"The Paris op was clean," he said, guardedly. He knew where this was headed, and he instinctively shielded himself from the upcoming pain he was anticipating.

She looked away, willing herself to not hide. Inhaling deeply to calm her jittering nerves, she looked him straight in the eyes. "I'm… sorry." Her voice cracked, but she instantly composed herself; it was something she had learnt to do so well it had become second nature – hiding her feelings. He looked over at her, surprised. Jenny didn't say sorry; she told people to build a bridge and get over it. He was quiet, but he looked at her. She held herself together pretty well, under his intense scrutiny.

Then, trying to sound as nonchalant as he could, he breezily said as he started down the stairs, "Nothin' to be sorry about, Jen." She silently breathed a sigh a relief, hearing a note of truth in his voice. He may have been angry at her for leaving him, but he knew the reasons, and he accepted them. Not to say that he had actually forgiven her; that particular mountain was going to be a bit harder to climb.

It wasn't fixed; nobody knew for certain if it ever would be. But it was a start, and with their stubbornness and headstrong attitudes they would somehow manage to overcome the obstacles that life was guaranteed to throw their way. And maybe, just maybe, one day they would clear her mess and have their own happy ending.

_**But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**I'm staring at the mess I made**_

_**As you turn, you take your heart and walk away. **_


	8. Kiss Me Slowly

Kiss Me Slowly by Parachute. Thanks to fashiongirl97 for beta-ing all the chapters :) Last song-fic for this story

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_**Stay with me, baby stay with me,**_

_**Tonight don't leave me alone.**_

_**Walk with me, come and walk with me,**_

_**To the edge of all we've ever known.**_

He was surprisingly silent, his mind musing thoughtfully as they meandered around the very top of the Eiffel tower that stood tall in the middle of the picturesque and iconic city. Jenny kept pointing out different, smaller landmarks, wasting quarters on the binoculars that were bolted down into the floor. She noticed the faraway look in his eye, and asked him, slightly concerned, "What's wrong, Jethro?" Broken from his reverie, he raised his eyebrows questioningly. Jenny had been noticing him being miles away more and more frequently recently, and she didn't know what to do, which alone frustrated her. "Come on, Jethro. Don't go off into your own little world. Don't leave me alone tonight, just standing here with a functional mute," she snapped, irked at his seemingly indifferent manner. Softening her tone a little, she added, "It's a beautiful night. Come and walk with me." He stood there with her, pressed against the railing and looking deep into one another's eyes, saying the things they never could with words. The wind blew against their faces; Jenny's long red hair blew gently into her eyes, only to be brushed away by his strong, warm hands. He gave a little smirk. There they stood, looking out on the city of Paris, the city of love, the city of light, the city where they had come together, where their love had only ever known. They stood there, together, until the sun set, covering the city in a blanket of darkness.

_**I can see you there with the city lights,**_

_**Fourteenth floor, pale blue eyes.**_

_**I can breathe you in.**_

_**Two shadows standing by the bedroom door,**_

_**No, I could not want you more than I did right then,**_

_**As our heads leaned in.**_

The lampposts were lit, softly lighting the streets up with a warm glow which broke the inky darkness. She searched the balconies for him, until she spotted him. There he stood, on the fourteenth floor, looking down at her with a smirk. His pale blue eyes met her sparkling emerald ones, and she laughed when she saw him pointing to the fire escape stairs. Climbing them quickly, she reached the fourteenth floor to find no one on the balcony. Staring around in a confused manner, she twisted around, only to find him an inch away from her face. She gave a little jump of surprise, and huffed indignantly when she saw him grinning with amusement. "I bet I can wipe that smirk off your face," she challenged, and he openly laughed, a carefree happy sound that she cherished. Then, the two shadows that were on the wall leaned in forward, and kissed.

_**Well, I'm not sure what this is gonna be,**_

_**But with my eyes closed all I see**_

_**Is the skyline, through the window,**_

_**The moon above you and the streets below.**_

_**Hold my breath as you're moving in,**_

_**Taste your lips and feel your skin.**_

_**When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly.**_

Eyes closed, his others senses were overflowing with stimulation. Through the window they could see the Parisian skyline, the bright crescent moon, and the cobblestone streets that the city showed off with pride. He slowed his breathing to match Jenny's, although he didn't fall asleep. He could feel his bitter heart open up a little, and he could feel Jenny take a place in his heart that had been vacant for too long. Leaning closer to her, he tasted her lips and ran his hands up and down her arms and legs, familiarizing himself with her. He wasn't sure what was going to happen when they returned stateside, when they had to be the people they had left in DC, but he hoped she wouldn't run. He suddenly felt a small finger poke him in his chest. "Still awake?" said the half way groggy, amused voice. "You know, if you want to wake me up all you gotta do is kiss me." She smirked wickedly, leaning forward and kissing him slowly, leisurely. All he did was smile as he wrapped his arms around the woman he loved.

_**Stay with me, baby stay with me,**_

_**Tonight don't leave me alone.**_

_**She shows me everything she used to know,**_

_**Picture frames and country roads,**_

_**When the days were long and the world was small.**_

"Can't you stay the night?" Jenny pleaded to the ever stoic Gibbs. "Please? We don't have work tomorrow, and I'm tired of sleeping in a cold bed." Her whining made him smile with a tinge of sadness; she reminded him so much of Kelly and Shannon. But in so many other ways, she was their complete opposite. "We can look through the scrapbook," she suggested, dragging him over to the warm couch, and pulling an old binder out of the bookshelf. Sitting next to Jethro on the couch, she opened to the first page, which contained a sepia picture of an old, country ranch style home. She recounted her days in that very first house she had ever lived in, when her father had been deployed for two years. She was five, and the land had been ten acres big. She had owned her own horse, a beautiful, strong palomino mare that she had raised since she was a little filly. She used to ride along the country road, racing the rare cars that seldom traveled down that path. As she smiled wistfully and got lost in the past, Jethro just looked at her, and observed her actions. He knew her better than almost anyone else, and he could see the nostalgia that came upon her. "That was when the days were longer and the world was smaller," she said, smiling contentedly, leaning her head against Jethro's chest simply to listen to his heartbeat. He didn't say anything; he just rubbed her back with his fingers in soothing circles. Then, lying there together, they both fell asleep in each other's embrace.

_**She stood by as it fell apart,**_

_**To separate rooms and broken hearts,**_

_**But I won't be the one to let you go.**_

_Who let's go first?_ Jenny thought sadly, as she thought back on the previous nights, alone and broken-hearted. He had been through a horrible case, and that pushed him to his limit. He had stormed out, angry for no apparent reason besides the case. She just wanted to help, but couldn't when she didn't know what was wrong. _I'm not gonna let you go,_ she promised, determined, although she wasn't sure if it was him or herself she was promising to. _We've been through too much to just let it end now._

_**Oh, I'm not sure what this is gonna be,**_

_**But with my eyes closed all I see**_

_**Is the skyline, through the window,**_

_**The moon above you and the streets below.**_

Finally. She did it, she was finally able to help him. With him resting on the pillow beside her, she looked out the window, viewing the late sunset, the hazy moon, and the paved cement roads that winded on outwards to other towns with other people living different lives. Not anything too impressive, but it was something. The blood-red sunset colored the sky a dark scarlet, and the half moon looked pure white high in the sky. It was rather pretty. But it was better with the man she loved in the center of her eyes, the centerpiece to all the natural work.

_**Hold my breath as you're moving in,**_

_**Taste your lips and feel your skin.**_

_**When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly.**_

"Don't' run," he whispered roughly with emotion, into her hair, muffling the request. "Don't run, Jenny. Not again."

_**Don't run away...**_

_**And it's hard to love again,**_

_**When the only way it's been,**_

_**When the only love you knew,**_

_**Just walked away...**_

_**If it's something that you want,**_

_**Darling you don't have to run,**_

_**You don't have to go...**_

"You don't have to go," he said, tightening his grip on her hand. "Don't walk away."

She shook her head, torn between heart and head in her internal battle, but the decision was made. It was hard to love when you had to keep walking away, but that was the only kind of love she had ever known. She had to go. She turned away. She had to right a wrong before she could open her heart up again.

_**Just stay with me, baby stay with me,**_

"Stay," he half-heartedly commanded.

"It is better to seek forgiveness than ask permission," she quoted, shouldering her gear and taking one last longing, bittersweet look at Jethro. "Goodbye. I promise I'll come back." He took one last hopeless look at her as she walked into the elevator, and out of his life.

_**Well, I'm not sure what this is gonna be,**_

_**But with my eyes closed all I see**_

_**Is the skyline, through the window,**_

_**The moon above you and the streets below. (Don't let go)**_

_**Hold my breath as you're moving in,**_

_**Taste your lips and feel your skin.**_

_**When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly.**_

The future was uncertain for both of them; neither knew anything for certain about what was going to happen. But Jenny was confident that they could finally be there for each other without one of them running away. She leaned in to kiss him, eyes closed, grabbing his muscular biceps. Opening her eyes, she could see the clear, blue eyes staring deeply straight into hers. Those were the blue eyes that she had spent many a night gazing into in one of their silent conversations. They reminded her of the ocean: free, rough, and deep but clear. She wrapped her arms around him, breathing in the distinct smell of him, and thought, we finally don't have to run anymore. She grinned, as if the knowledge was worth pure gold. And to her, it was.

_**Oh, I'm not sure where this is gonna go,**_

_**But in this moment all I know**_

_**Is the skyline, through the window,**_

_**The moon above you and the streets below. (Baby, don't let go)**_

_**Hold my breath as you're moving in,**_

_**Taste your lips and feel your skin.**_

_**When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly.**_

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_Review?_


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